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Michael becomes Michelle, Skinner is off the wagon, and the White Stripes are off to the ballet! Well, la-di-bloody-dah!

Michael Jackson: born a black man, now a white … woman?

Soon to be Michelle Jackson was spotted wearing a pair of slinky jeans, high heels and a hat that wouldn’t have looked out of place at Royal Ascot Ladies Day, while holidaying in San Tropez this week. The singer, who’s been living in Bahrain since being cleared of child sex charges last year, has not actually had the proverbial chop yet – though I can’t help but wonder.

On the subject of dramatic falls from grace, The Darkness have finally been dropped by record label Atlantic, after their second album failed to meet expectations. Insider reports suggest that lead singer Justin Hawkins long battle against drugs also played a major role – I’m sure the album sounded great to him!

Maybe he wishes he’d taken a leaf from Razorlight’s Johnny Borell who was spotted at the Vodafone Live awards yesterday sipping on Jasmine Tea – and they say Rock’n’Roll is dead!

Maybe Mike Skinner can keep it alive though, as he’s leapt spectacularly off the wagon while on a holiday in Ibiza … errr, figures!

The Streets front man, who quit drinking and drugs eight months ago said he felt “dreadful the next day,” but confessed he “did everything”! Nice one Mike, that is Rock’n’Roll!

The White Stripes however, seem to be leaving their rock roots behind as they’ve just had their music arranged for the Royal Ballet. The production, which gets its premiere, next month, was the brainchild of composer Joby Talbot. He says The Stripes’ front man gave his blessing with one stipulation: "We weren't allowed to move to a posher studio. We had to do the whole thing in Wapping" – nice one Jack, that’ll learn ‘em!

SL